The folks at Time have been busy compiling 50 top 10 lists for 2007. Have you ever wondered what tops the charts when it comes to God?
A teacher of Jewish law once asked Jesus about that. His kind was into pursuing power and perks through practicing ‘show religion’.
Jesus answered him in two parts: First, be loyal to God with your whole being; second, love ‘the other’ as yourself.
How would you describe this life creed? For me, I’d say: challenging and profound.
“Whose side are you on?” I have used that question with varying degrees of import. Lately it’s a line I try to sell when I just passed the basketball to the other team.
Joshua uses it in a situation with far greater significance. He is preparing to lead his people into battle; before him stands a “man” with sword drawn. Joshua approaches asking whether the “man” is friend or foe. “Neither” is the man’s response.
That caught my attention. But after reading the whole account it makes sense. The “man” is the commander of the Lord’s army. His allegiance is to the Lord, neither to Joshua nor to Joshua’s enemies. The real question that needs to be answered is “Whose side is Joshua on?” The Lord’s?
Don’t we face the same dynamic? We are preparing to face a challenge (in the family, at work, wherever) and we would like to know if God is on our side. Wrong question! Much better to ask ourselves whether we are on God’s side. Tougher but better.
Substance abuse among our kids, when does it start? High school? That is pretty much what I thought, until I read an article that cited a study about drug use among youth in my area. That study found that 31% of seventh graders had begun to abuse alcohol by the sixth grade!
Time to get my head out of the sand and realize that being intentional about forming my sixth grader’s understanding about alcohol, prescription drugs and street drugs is upon me.
That same article indicated that a positive parent-child relationship plays a key role in drug proofing my kid. Recently my sixth grader talked me into playing a ‘first-person’ video game along with him. Seriously, I stink at video games. I am a digital alien who can count the number of hours spent with a joy stick with two hands and still have fingers left over. But my son looks forward to this “time” together, and I am finally seeing that for me it isn’t about the video game but about building relationship with him.
What are the issues? The issues that guys are dealing with…guys in the church, guys in the workplace, guys at the rink and on the court? Here is a list that came out of discussions that four of us had yesterday. They are not ranked…this is just the order they came up.
I would love to hear your take.
From the world of football here are your choices: the tailgate party, sitting in the stands, buying from the concessions, gathering in the huddle, or executing the play. Which one is the best analogy to living according to the way of Jesus?
My answer: the last one, executing the play. Although many of us might have picked that one, too many of us would have to admit (at least to ourselves) that we spend more of our time and energy in activities that are more analogous to the first four things on the list.
Guys, Jesus has called us to active participation in God’s kingdom work. With his first followers he taught them, he showed them and then he sent them to do what he had been doing. It was in the adventure of doing that they learned much. Here is an example of what I mean. In Lk 8, Jesus and his followers get caught in a storm, Jesus calms the elements and the disciples say to one another, “Who is this? He commands even the winds and the water, and they obey him” (Lk 8:25 NIV). Shortly after that, Jesus dispatches the disciples to do kingdom work. When they return Jesus takes the opportunity to ask them who they think he is. Peter answers that Jesus is “the Christ of God” (Lk 9:20 NIV). Peter at least, if not the others, had moved way beyond “Who is this?” to realizing that Jesus is the Lord Messiah. My point is simple: doing kingdom work is key to learning deeper God-truths.
What is keeping you out of the play?
Do you know people that live for the moment? What about those that seem to be haunted by the past? And others that live in fear of the future?
The guys talked about that (and prayed about that) over our weekly fix of doughnuts. Here is my two cents.
As followers of Christ, our past may be full of “issues”, some that we own and some that was dumped on us; either way Jesus can deliver us from that darkness. Our past doesn’t need to cast condemning shadows on the present. We are free.
As men of the Way, our future is secure with God. He knows what we need to live and grow and he promises to provide that. The future need not be a source of fear or worry or paralysis. It is a destination we anticipate with hope.
As sons of the King, we are able to live fully in the moment, but we do not live for the moment. Our priorities and passions are becoming kingdom-centred not self-centred. Our moments are opportunities to lead boldly by serving Truth.
What is your two cents?
Where was Adam when his bride was being accosted by the serpent? Don’t give me the line, “The text doesn’t say exactly.” Maybe not ‘exactly’, but what it says is plenty for my point. Adam, wherever he was ‘exactly’, he wasn’t ‘there’ putting himself forward to protect his wife from the craftiness of the Father of all lies. He wasn’t ‘there’ putting himself forward to provide guidance about God’s command. Wherever he was, he wasn’t up front giving himself for his wife and he is not up front for the rest of us husbands either. We must look elsewhere for a role model.
Paul points us in the right direction. He writes,
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (Eph 5:25)
Whereas the first Adam gave up his bride when God came a callin’ in the garden, the second Adam gave himself up in the garden for all those that would become his bride the church.
Here is the deal: Men of the Way, step up, put up and give themselves up for the wellbeing of their bride.
How happy are the young people in your life? The happiness of American youth (aged 13-24) was the focus of an MTV/Associate Press study. Let me recap some of the findings I found noteworthy.
1. General Happiness – 65 percent of respondents say they are happy with the way things are going in their lives in general and 62 percent think they will be happier in the future than they are now.
2. Parents, Family and Relationships – Parents are seen as an overwhelmingly positive influence in the lives of most young people. Remarkably, nearly half of respondents mention at least one of their parents as a hero.
3. Religion and Spirituality – 80 percent of those who say spirituality is the most important thing in life say they are happy with life in general, compared with 60 percent of those who say that spirituality is not an important part of life at all.4. Fortune and Fame – 70 percent say they want to be rich – and nearly half think it’s at least somewhat likely they will be someday – but just 29 percent want to be famous. Only 17 percent think they will be famous.
5. Technology – And contrary to popular views of technology as a source of stress, many young people would be more stressed out without technology, with nearly half saying they never turn off their cell phones – even when they’re trying to chill out.
I see some of this in my own kids, particularly regarding technology. Instant messaging, texting and Facebook is their tech-enabled “hanging out”. The means have changed from “back in the day” but not the goal. Do I need to cut them some more slack?
Hey did you read that parents are still considered as heroes by their kids! Could it be we have more influence than we think, more than they might be willing to let on? For me that stat was a little boost to keep on speaking into the lives of my kids…they might secretly appreciate it.
What caught your attention?
When it came to having meals together as a family I thought we were doing pretty well. Let’s revie
w. Last night all of us ate together. Sunday night, well my daughter was entertaining friends downstairs, but we all ate the same stuff. Saturday, hmmm — oh yah we were out. Friday, nope again; one was at work and another at a youth thing. Thursday, nope; we were busy at the church. Wednesday, yes! Tuesday, nope; I was traveling. So what is that? 2 out of 7?
Isn’t that pretty good?
It is not according to a study done at Columbia University regarding the importance of family dinners.
The study found that in comparison to families that have frequent family dinners (5 or more per week), those teens that have supper with their families twice or less per week are:
The study also reported that:
I don’t come away from reading these findings thinking that if we just have more meals together as a family that everything will turn out rosy. But the studies have reinforced for me the importance of regularly plugging into my kids’ lives.
What do you take away?
As a dad I want more for my three sons then that they get bigger, stronger and learn to eat their vegetables. I want them to develop inner strength, character and spiritual maturity. I don’t want them just to be big boys playing at life; I want them to be men of God leading with integrity.
Dave Conklin at Warrior’s Hand posted a list of ten needs of a fourteen year old boy. I have reproduced that here,
1. To climb a mountain and look down from the peak.
2. To sit around a campfire with team mates and good friends.
3. To test his strength and his skills on his very own.
4. To be alone with his own thoughts and with his God.
5. To reach out and find the hand of an adult willing to help.
6. To have a code to live by…easily understood and fair.
7. Play hard for the fun of it…and work hard for the thrill of it.
8. To have a chance to fail…and know why.
9. To have good friends and to be a good friend.
10. To have a hero…and a vision to measure him by.
I love this list. In particular #8 caught my attention. It is tough to see your sons making choices that you know very likely will lead to failure. Tough because you would like to spare them the pain of it. But pain sometimes is the better teacher. So when do you as dad intervene and say, “No you can’t do that”? When do you give advice but give them the freedom to make the final choice even if it leads to failure? And how do you effectively give feedback when failure indeed is the outcome of their choice?
Any thoughts?
